I Watched

Erin Niven normally lives in Guildford for University but when lockdown began, she came home to Erskine and since then has been working at LittleInch Care Home in Erskine as a carer.  From her experience there she has written a poem titled “I Watched” and submitted a recorded version. This is Erin’s story.

I watched someone die today.

I held their hand and told them it was okay.

That I was right there.

But I thought silently to myself, none of this is fair.

That’s a cliche I suppose,

Cause everyone goes

But not in this way

With someone you barely know holding your hand as you slip away

Into the unknown

And at the end of my shift I’ll go home.

I’ll stand in the shower and I’ll wash it all away

The germs, the virus, but the sadness stays.

Because you weren’t just a name, a number, a statistic

You were a friend, a lover, a human, that’s what will stick

In my head and heart as I toss and turn

Cause after today the world seems to burn.

It’s on fire and I can’t put it out.

It makes me want to scream and it makes me want to shout.

Instead I’ll clap for our keyworkers but that doesn’t include Boris

Because if he’d done his job right we could have avoided a lot of this.

I watched someone die today but I also watched people live

I watched them laugh and cry and talk and give.

Give a shoulder to cry on or a smile in the street.

Give time to talk or time just to greet.

And they weren’t doing it for fame or for clout

They were doing it cause they care about

You. And Me.

The people that we are and the people that we’ll be.